Neglected children.

[sUbMiTa]

Assallam Allaykum

My cousin has a neighbor who has 2 kids there not muslim btw.

Every time I visit her I see the kids in their backyard half naked no shoes, hats on especially on hot days.

My cousin said that’s how they are everyday and she said their mother works and leaves the kids with her boyfriend and they get more neglected during that time.

There’s a boy 2 or so yrs old who is apparently from her boyfriend however the girl who is 3 or so is not. I’ve been very worried about them my cousin said she gives them water to drink and stuff to eat through the fence.

I want to call the CPS however I don’t want the parents to think my cousins call them and maybe do something.

I feel soo sorry for the kids and I don’t know what to do.

What should I do? Any advise will be much Appreciated.

Jazzak Allah Khair.

[Musa]

Call if you think you must. Get someone else to call so that you don't have to lie about whether or not it was you that called.

[Waiting all my life...]

I think you should call, you never know there might have been other people who have called to report them or they might have already had a warning or something like that. If you think its that bad you have to call!

[Sunshine]

Have your cousins spoken to the Mother at all?

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

Wa Alaikum Assalaam

I don't think you want to be jumping to conclusions about something which in your eyes MAY be more exaggerated than the actual facts. These are young children you're talking about, and you don't want them taken away from their parents.

Perhaps the mother is working around the clock to have a roof over their head, food in their stomach and clothing on their back, and she doesn't know how they are treated/supervised when she is not around. Perhaps in your eyes the standard of living is unacceptable, but with many other families across the country/world, it's normal.

Make istikhaarah if ur not sure of the decision to make. Speak to the mother in a round-about fashion and get to know her situation in more detail. Would you like your children taken away from you? Get your cousin to keep a diary of what she sees, so you can have some facts on paper which can be easily referred back to.

Call the CPS and describe the situation, but don't give them ur cousin's neighbour's details, and see the kind of feekback they give you in regards to the steps/actions they take in a situation where it is suspected children are being neglected.

Yes, you don't want to keep quiet and have something drastic happen to these children due to the neglect from their parents, but at the same time, you don't want to explode a perfectly normal situation and split a family apart.

[fatima_43]

yeah Unsur is right. It`s better to understand their situation b4 you make a move. You may do something you`ll regret later, and maybe they`re happy like that. Trust me it`s not good for them to be away from their mother , they`re still young. Maybe there`s something else you could do to help them instead of calling the CPS. It`s the saddest thing for the mother that her kids be taken away.
The best thing you can do is make du`a because only Allah azzawajal can change the situation.

[Ahmad]

Every time I visit her I see the kids in their backyard half naked no shoes, hats on especially on hot days.

For kids, that's normal.

[sUbMiTa]

Assallam Allaykum.

When i was posting this i didnt want to write a long story so i was just trying to give u guys a general idea of what the situation is.

There is alot more to this family.From what ive been told the parents are on drugs and the mother leaves the kids and works at nights.

However apart from that my cousin said that the kids are always crying and their always dirty.

She said they cry and say they want water and stuff.

SubhanAllah ofcourse i wouldnt want kids to be separated from their parents but having said that i dont feel comfertable sitting around watching these kids being neglected.

I dont want them to be taken away however i think if the CPS could visit everynow and than.Maybe that would make the parents take care of the kids a bit better.

I dont know subhanAllah as a parent it just doesnt feel normal what i see when im at my cousins.

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

From what ive been told the parents are on drugs and the mother leaves the kids and works at nights.

How do the ones who informed you know they are on drugs?

The mother leaves the kids ALONE at night and goes to work? Again, how do u know there isn't another adult in the house with them?

[sUbMiTa]

Assallam Allaykum

sis i didnt post here to be questioned about their whole life story.

But since u asked my cousin's husband knows very well what they are like.(thats all im saying).

Anyways i didnt say there wasnt an adult with them at nights the girls step dad stays home while the mum goes wherever she goes.

Im talking about during the day they see everything through the fence.

From what i can see and been told i believe their being neglected however i cant do anything about it,but i will keep an eye out for those kids and see if their situation gets worse.

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

Wa Alaikum Assalaam.

Well sis, u made it sound like something negative when you said "the mother leaves the kids and works at nights."

And since u want advice, it's a bit hard to give it if we don't know what you know, that's all i'm saying. Anyway, by all means keep an eye on them insha-ALLAH and may ALLAH Ta3aala reward you for your efforts.

Abdul Aziz is also correct in what he said, but i'm sure the DCS does get it wrong at times. I remember a story when a Muslim woman had her young infant child taken from her because it was thought she had killed her previous children, when infact it was due to some illness which they had died (plus one fell out of a building and died). In the end though, they found she was innocent, but she still had to endure and suffer being away from her child.

At the very least, i think you should speak to the mother in a subtle manner (as Meme suggested), and try and get some info before you call the DCS.

[sUbMiTa]

Jazzak Allah Khair for your advise.

Yeh i wanted to see the mother and maybe say hello but she is never outside all she does is scream to the kids from inside and swear at them.

Anyway subhanAllah its just one of those things thats makeing me worry.

Khair InshAllah.

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

Wa Iyyakum sis, i know it's not an easy position to be in.

A thought just came to mind. Perhaps you should speak to her other neighbours and see if they have the same concerns, or have seen some untoward action from the parents toward the children.

[aussiemu]

assalamu alaikum,

If there is drugs involved in the house (and I can kind of imagine what they might be alike from the descriptions outlined) then I don't advise that you speak to them personally as I don't think they would take the advice too kindly.

I agree with AbdulAziz you should just call the child protection agency and let them do their job. If nothing is wrong, then insha'Allah nothing will happen and whilst they can make mistakes, I still think potential harm to children is more of an issue than anything else. For things like working late or having a hard life, I really doubt that the agency would take the kids away. It would require more evidence of neglect or abuse.

UnsurUlUmmah: In the case you mentioned, whilst it is sad what happend and that she was innocent, you can't blame them for being suspicious if the kids are dying in infancy particularly more than one child.

BTW the idea of children being outside in hot weather isn't a big thing to me (we did that when we were younger) but things like crying for water etc seems like more of a bigger issue particularly if your cousin is the one who ends up giving them these things. I'm guessing this is over a long period of time and not just one or two incidents.

There is the reality that not all parents are loving and look after their kids properly. So whilst they may not be actually abusing or neglecting them from a criminal/legal aspect, they could just be bad parents.

If I were you I'd pray istikhara and if you feel right about it then call them up and do it anonymously. I guess I feel more for the kids than the parents here.

may Allah help you in the right decision.

wassalamu alaikum

[sUbMiTa]

Wa Allaykum Was Sallam sis.

Jazzak Allah Khair for your advise.

Thats the thing when im at my cousins house her side sliding door is facing the backyard where the kids are and i can see and feel that something isnt right,I will do istiikaada inshAllah and see how i go.

May Allah protect all the inocent kids.

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

Assalaamu Alaikum Sis

Was there an outcome with this concern of yours?

Wassalaamu Alaikum

[UmmNRZ]

Subhan Allah I only just read this thread. Insha'Allah the kids get the attention they need and the problem (if any) is sorted out in the best possible way with little harm to the children. It's sad to hear this, especially to young kids who are so dependent and cannot fend for themselves.

[Aasiyah]

thats sad sis, i cant hear stories like this especially when it somes to kids may Allah make it easy on them and protect them!

[sUbMiTa]

Assalaamu Alaikum Sis

Was there an outcome with this concern of yours?

Wassalaamu Alaikum

Wa Allaykum Was Sallam sis.

The last time I saw those kids there was some people coming and going with shopping bags every week or so.So that was good to see as they might have got help some how inshAllah.

I was also told by my cousin that she had her baby. (not sure if I had mentioned she was pregnant.)

However my cousin has moved couple of months ago so I have no idea if things have changed for the better or worse since than.

May Allah protect those children and guide them to Islam. ameen

[Al Baitel 'ateeq]

Ok sis, kheir insha-Allah and aameen to the dua.