I am looking for advice from the married brothers and sisters on the forum. What would you do if your spouse, who was a practicing Muslim, stops praying for the majority of the week and stops going to the masjid for jummah? What would you say or do to encourage them to get back on the right path? What do you say when you ask your spouse to pray with you and they say, "I just don't feel like it" but professes to still believe in Islam and the Qur'an?
Any advice or suggestions would be appreciated. Jazak Allah Khair.
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29-Sep-2011 10:10 PM
- Join Date
- Sep 2011
- Melbourne, VIC
29-Sep-2011 10:19 PM
- Join Date
- Oct 2007
Pray to Allah to guide him/her. It is a tricky situation best to consult an Islamic scholar on this issue.
29-Sep-2011 11:13 PM
Wa Aleikum Assalaam, subhaan'Allah thats a very tough situation...
You need to advise and remind them about the obligations that are upon us as much as you can. Dont force it upon them, just try to remind them about it, in a manner that wont turn them off it...
Also ask them why they've stopped/decreased their prayer...
If nothing changes, consult a sheikh to sit him/her down and talk to them and see whats going on...it may be that their faith is at a low at the moment (which is normal), but if its to the extent that they're not praying the obligatory prayers, its a little worrying...
If you dont see any change after doing your best in reminding him/her of prayers, and after the sheikh (or a 3rd party) speaks to him/her, i would personally (you asked what i would do in this situation) get a divorce.
May Allah swt keep us all steadfast."Everything Allah Plans To Be Will Always Become A Reality"
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30-Sep-2011 09:40 AM
Ruling on staying with a husband who does not pray
My husband neglects his religion; he does not fast in Ramadaan and he does not pray, and moreover, he stops me from doing any good deed. He has also started to be so suspicious of me, that he has left his work to stay home so he can watch over me. What should I do?
Praise be to Allaah.
It is not permissible to stay with a husband who is like this, because by neglecting the salaah (prayer) he is a kaafir, and it is not permissible for a Muslim woman to marry a kaafir or stay with him. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“… if you ascertain that they [women] are true believers, send them not back to the disbelievers, they are not lawful (wives) for the disbelievers nor are the disbelievers lawful (husbands) for them…” [al-Mumtahinah 60:10]
The marriage between you and him is null and void, and there can be no nikaah (marriage) between you unless Allaah guides him and he repents to Allaah and comes back to Islam. In that case the marriage will remain valid. The husband’s conduct is not correct, and it seems to me that he is suffering from some kind of (mental) illness, namely paranoia and waswaas (insinuating whispers of the Shaytaan) from which some people suffer with regard to their worship and their dealings with others. Nothing will get rid of this sickness but remembering Allaah (dhikr), seeking refuge in Him and putting one’s trust in Him to get rid of it. What matters is that for your part, you have to leave him and not stay with him, because he is a kaafir and you are a believer. With regard to your husband, we advise him to come back to his religion and to seek refuge with Allaah from the accursed Shaytaan, and to try to recite some beneficial du’aa’s with which to rid his heart of this waswaas. We ask Allaah to help him. And Allaah knows best.
From the Fataawa of Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen, in al-Da’wah magazine, no. 1709, p. 34
http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/6257/h...pped%20praying'Be in this world as if you were a stranger or a traveller.'
30-Sep-2011 12:18 PM
Hmm I'd try to set up a meeting with a sheikh or someone who is in the daawa field who could perhaps council him and give him daawa. If he has practicing family members who could perhaps raise it with him ,you should ask then to help.“I have never debated with a knowledgeable person but beaten him, and I have never debated with an ignorant person but been beaten by him.”
- Imam al-Shafi`i (May Allah have mercy on him)
05-Oct-2011 04:43 PM
- Join Date
- Mar 2011
^ i think its better advice.
05-Oct-2011 08:44 PM
You should try advising, but if the spouse continues to refuse to pray, then the best option is divorce. Because abandonment of salaat is kufr.
Imaam Ahmad said that the one who does not pray because of laziness is a kafir. This is the more correct view and is that indicated by the evidence of the Book of Allah and the Sunnah of His Messenger, and by the words of the Salaf and the proper understanding.
(Al-Sharh al-Mumti’ ‘ala Zaad al-Mustanqi’, 2/26).
“But if they repent [by rejecting Shirk (polytheism) and accept Islamic Monotheism], perform As-Salaat (Iqaamat-as-Salaat) and give Zakaat, then they are your brethren in religion.”
“Then, there has succeeded them a posterity who have given up As-Salaat (the prayers) [i.e. made their Salaat (prayers) to be lost, either by not offering them or by not offering them perfectly or by not offering them in their proper fixed times] and have followed lusts. So they will be thrown in Hell. Except those who repent and believe (in the Oneness of Allah and His Messenger Muhammad), and work righteousness. Such will enter Paradise and they will not be wronged in aught.” [Maryam 19:59-60]
“Between a man and shirk and kufr there stands his neglect of the prayer.”
It was narrated that Buraydah ibn al-Husayb said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah say: ‘The covenant that distinguishes between us and them is the prayer, and whoever neglects it has disbelieved (become a kafir).’” (It was narrated by Ahmad, Abu Dawood, al-Tirmidhi, al-Nisaa’i and Ibn Maajah).
‘Abd-Allah ibn Shaqeeq said: "the companions of the Prophet did not think that neglecting any deed made a person a kafir, apart from neglecting the prayer."
Reported by al-Tirmidhi and al-Haakim.
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